This past week I was a guest on Good Company on WKYC Channel 3 to talk about an article that appeared on msn.com listing the 8 reasons why guys cheat in a relationship. Here they are, along with a short commentary on my part:
1. For payback – it may feel good momentarily, but now you have two affairs to face.
2. Physical Attraction just isn’t there – yes, chemistry is important, but more attention needs to be paid to what’s on the inside.
3. Partner is traveling too much – true, you can’t have a relationship if there is no quality time spent.
4. Being monogamous at an early age feels like he’s missing out – understandable, but then talk about it and end the relationship rather than running out and having an affair.
5. Not on the same page – having the same values is vital to a lasting relationship.
6. Too much fighting – fighting doesn’t feel good. How you feel about yourself when you’re with someone contributes to the longevity of the relationship.
7. He needs a shot of self-esteem – who doesn’t? Building each other up in a relationship is key.
8. To fulfill a fantasy – feels good at the time. Be careful, though. It might kill your reality.
FYI, women can have the same reasons for cheating. A radical idea is to avoid all this by telling your mate up front when you start to feel like you might want to have an affair. It will spark a conversation to either work on your relationship or end it. It makes life a lot less complicated!