I can’t let anymore time go by without acknowledging the on-the-mark points Terry Pluto made in his Plain Dealer column this past Sunday. The title of his column is “Guidelines for Keeping Your Marriage on Solid Ground.” Here is a condensed version of some of the points he makes:
1. Build your marital house on rock, so when trouble comes it can’t be washed away.
2. If communication breaks down, a relationship can easily be reduced to exchanges about daily “stuff,” or it can collapse completely.
3. Is money spent on things you don’t need, only to impress people you don’t even know?
4. Talk/pray about any major financial decision before acting on it, even if you have to wait 24 hours before the purchase.
5. Look to yourself and to God to help you find happiness, rather than depending on your mate to create it for you.
6. Stop scorekeeping. Rather than complaining about what your spouse isn’t doing to help you, think about what you can do to help your spouse.
7. Criticize the action rather than the person. Phrases like, “It was a bad idea when you were late and didn’t call me,” work much better than, “You’re always late,” or “You never call.”
8. To the men, make eye contact with your wife when listening to her. To do otherwise shows you’re not listening.
9. To the women, give your husband time to decompress at the end of the day before telling him what needs to be done.
10. Find a service/ministry you and your mate can provide for others.