8 Relationship Tips for Living 24/7 Under One Roof

This month’s Positive Point discusses my Skype appearance in March on WKYC Channel 3, “It’s All About You”.

I discussed the unusual situation we are all dealing with right now during the COVID-19 pandemic: How do you survive living with your loved ones 24/7 under the same roof?

Below is the talking points I used in the show:

1. Keep a team mindset. There will be moments when you feel you and your mate or child are on opposite sides of an issue, but remember – you are all on the same team. No one in your family signed on for this situation, but it’s where you find yourselves. To get through this, we all have to work together.
2. Have an “exit” space/room. There will be tense times when you feel like you’re about to blow a gasket. When that happens, have a certain designated place to go to so that you can calm down and decompress. It’s important to announce that you need to leave to get some space so that your family doesn’t feel abandoned. Doing this teaches kids and even partners to honor your personal space.
3. Be a hawkeye for humor. Even in unusual times like these, we can still laugh. I don’t mean laughing at another person, but laughing at a situation. This is a great time to be playful at certain moments. Allowing lightness into our lives will change our mood and the energy in our home.
4. Catch someone in the act of doing something right. Our human brains tend to veer toward the negative, but especially in times like these, we must be vigilant about noticing the positives in those with whom we live. When you notice your family member doing anything well or helpful, make sure you appreciate that person!
5. Now is not the time for blame. We are all doing the best we can. Forgive easily.
6. Structure, structure, structure. It’s easy for one day to bleed into another during a situation like this. For those of you who have children in school, you already have somewhat of a structure built into your day. If you don’t have school-age children, it’s important to set up some kind of schedule. For example (just a generic example):
   • Quiet time
   • Exercise
   • Breakfast
   • Work remotely
   • Break for lunch
   • Take a walk
   • Order food on-line, etc.

You see where I’m going with this? I don’t know about you, but if I just start my day without structure, it literally floats away!

7. Have in-home dates. Even though you and your mate can’t go out somewhere to spend quality time together, you can get creative and alternate planning an in-home date! Play a game, order a pizza and watch a movie, pull up a YouTube dance lesson and try your hand at doing the tango, cook together. There are many things you can do to make a memory together in your own home!
8. Have family meetings. Having a family meeting once a week or once every other week acts as an anchor for you and your kids. The first thing on the agenda for the meeting is to plan something fun to do as a family. The second thing is to work together to solve a problem. It could be how to best clean up the kitchen, or how to put a system together for family clutter. The focus for the problem is on how to work as a team. Keep your mind open to your children’s ideas and you’ll get buy-in from them quicker. Always end the family meeting with a family hug!

If you need some guidelines on having a successful family meeting, download my free Family Meeting Guidelines.