This month’s Ask Coach Kathy talks about the habit of micromanaging your mate.
My wife keeps telling me she’s tired of me micromanaging her. She says I make comments about how she chops vegetables, waters the plants, and other household stuff. I’m just trying to give her some tips and make her life easier. How is that a bad thing?
If you are consistently correcting your wife on how she does different things, she’s going to feel criticized and less than adequate. Whatever she is doing may not be the way you would do it, but if the job gets done, that’s what counts.
To take it a step further, think about actually commending her for what she is doing, even if her process is different than yours. Otherwise, a parent-child dynamic may form in your relationship, and believe me, that’s not something you want!
For this to change, you’ll need to pay attention to what and how statements come out of your mouth. Most likely this is simply a habit that’s formed over the years. If you think before you speak about something your wife is doing, you’ll be able to change the course of this habit and even eradicate it.
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Do you have sensitive issues in your relationships that you need help with? Ask Coach Kathy about it. Submit your question to Coach Kathy using the form below: