During an appearance on Channel 3’s morning talk show, Good Company, this week I talked about 5 concrete things couples can do to affair-proof their marriage or relationship. Here is the list:
1. Challenge each other to grow. When one person feels the other doesn’t support his or her personal growth, that’s a RED FLAG! Partners have to build each other up – not tear each other down.
2. Spend a consistent amount of quality time together. Humans are not meant to be isolated, especially from someone to whom the are committed.
3. When a problem arises, nip it in the bud by addressing it productively. Build a muscle memory for teamwork.
4. Avoid toxic couples. Hang with couples who make their relationship a priority. Couples can, without realizing it, become like the company they keep.
5. Take a radical step. If you start to feel like you want to have an affair, go to your partner asap and tell him or her. What feeds an affair is secrecy. If you put it out there that it has crossed your mind to have an affair, it will do two things: deflate the mystique of the affair and wake up your mate to the reality that there is a serious problem in your relationship.