In an issue of the magazine, First for women, is an article on the effects of walking away to cool off in the midst of an argument. A study at the University of California at Berkeley shows that doing this will make a positive impact on your relationship.
The researchers watched more than 80 tapes of middle-aged and elderly couples as they argued. Findings showed that the wife’s ability to calm down soon after a fight made the largest difference in the couple’s short-term and long-term happiness in the relationship. The researchers also showed that when the wife (not the husband) initiated solutions, the couple was able to resolve the argument more quickly.
Coach Kathy’s 2 Cents
If I may add my 2 cents in regards to the above article, I believe that the best way to approach creating solutions, regardless of who initiates them, is as a team. Before solutions can be decided upon, each person needs to feel heard (without judgment or criticism) for whatever feeling he or she is experiencing. Once that happens, solutions come rushing in and teamwork feels natural.